Christine of Stine Writing is our host for this photoprompt. Great picture.
Image from http://www.dreamstime.com
What yer looking at? Never seen a baby before? You’d better not have eyes on my pal here. I’ll spit in yer eye and he’ll have yer ‘and off.
He’s my guardian see? We’re mates and look out for each other, which is more than I can say for all those stuffing their faces at the buffet table. Free nosh, that’s all they’re here for. Bit of singing, mumble a few phrases and a couple of photos (how I hated being passed round like a parcel), preening of the new parents and grandparents. Sheesh.
If I hear one more person say ‘he’s got your eyes’, or ‘your nose’ or a ‘cheeky smile’, I’ll fill my nappy, smile sweetly and provide my own aromatherapy. That’ll teach ’em to dunk me with water!
Won’t go down well that the toast will be with MILK!
142 words.
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About pensitivity101
I am a retired number cruncher with a vivid imagination and wacky sense of humour which extends to short stories and poetry. I love to cook and am a bit of a dog whisperer as I get on better with them than people sometimes!
In November 2020, we lost our beloved Maggie who adopted us as a 7 week old pup in March 2005. We decided to have a photo put on canvas as we had for her predecessor Barney. We now have three pictures of our fur babies on the wall as we found a snapshot of Kizzy, my GSD when Hubby and I first met so had hers done too.
On February 24th 2022 we were blessed to find Maya, a 13 week old GSD pup who has made her own place in our hearts. You can follow our training methods, photos and her growth in my blog posts.
From 2014 to 2017 'Home' was a 41 foot narrow boat where we made strong friendships both on and off the water. We were close to nature enjoying swan and duck families for neighbours, and it was a fascinating chapter in our lives.
We now reside in a small bungalow on the Lincolnshire coast where we have forged new friendships and interests.
What yer looking at? Never seen a baby before? You’d better not have eyes on my pal here. I’ll spit in yer eye and he’ll have yer ‘and off.
pensitivity101 
What a crazy baby.
Ha! Thanks Jim
You are welcome and thanks for making me laugh.
🙂
Seems overly agitated
Maybe the nappy was already full!
Yup, could be.
You have to wonder, don’t you? 😀
My experience of babies is practically non existent being just nieces and nephews, but sometimes I wondered what they were thinking.
Hysterical, Di, but honestly … I’m kinda scared of that baby!
It’s the lethal nappy isn’t it!!
🤣 🤣 🤣
Haha!! Delightful take on the baptismal party!
Thanks Val.
Hahahaha! Crazy little bugger! I think he knows how to clear a room! Great monologue!
Thanks Christine. Glad you liked it.
Reblogged this on Stine Writing and commented:
Di’s monologue…baby style
Love this 💜💜
Thanks!
Lol. 😀 I love it!
Thanks Carol Anne