Fancy some groans?

I have just received my monthly pension newsletter and included were some Christmas jokes.
My apologies for the groans, but they made me smile, and the only one I was familiar with was the last!

What did the snowman order at the burger restaurant?
Icebergers with extra chilly sauce.

Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Arthur who?
Arthur any mince pies left?

What goes Ho Ho Whoosh, Ho Ho Whoosh?
Santa going through a revolving door!!

What’s green, covered in tinsel and goes ribbet ribbet?
Mistle-toad ?

What do angry mice send to each other at Christmas?
Cross Mouse Cards

What type of key do you need for a Nativity play?
A don-key!
He-haw, he- haw he- haw! ?

What do ornaments do on Christmas trees.
Not much, they just hang out

How do you turn a Christmas tree into a reindeer?
You put on HORNaments

Why did Santa Claus get a parking ticket on Christmas Eve?
He left his sleigh in a snow parking zone

How does Good King Wencleslas like his pizza?
Deep pan crisp and even.

About pensitivity101

I am a retired number cruncher with a vivid imagination and wacky sense of humour which extends to short stories and poetry. I love to cook and am a bit of a dog whisperer as I get on better with them than people sometimes! In November 2020, we lost our beloved Maggie who adopted us as a 7 week old pup in March 2005. We decided to have a photo put on canvas as we had for her predecessor Barney. We now have three pictures of our fur babies on the wall as we found a snapshot of Kizzy, my GSD when Hubby and I first met so had hers done too. On February 24th 2022 we were blessed to find Maya, a 13 week old GSD pup who has made her own place in our hearts. You can follow our training methods, photos and her growth in my blog posts. From 2014 to 2017 'Home' was a 41 foot narrow boat where we made strong friendships both on and off the water. We were close to nature enjoying swan and duck families for neighbours, and it was a fascinating chapter in our lives. We now reside in a small bungalow on the Lincolnshire coast where we have forged new friendships and interests.
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25 Responses to Fancy some groans?

  1. It has been a long time since I heard The Knock Know-out jokes.

  2. Sadje says:


  3. scifihammy says:

    haha Thanks for the laughs ๐Ÿ˜€

  4. The jokes kept getting worse, but sadly I read all of them.

  5. willowdot21 says:

    Ouch! Loved them ๐Ÿ’œ

  6. ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜„

  7. emkingston says:

    *giggles* Thank you! I needed that!

  8. Carol anne says:

    Lol ๐Ÿ˜€ loved these!

  9. murisopsis says:

    Haha! these are just up Sparky’s alley!! I can’t wait to tell his a couple!

  10. J Cosmo Newbery says:

    Should I laugh? Should I groan? No! I’ll steal them and make others laugh and groan!

Comments are closed.