Sunday Poser # 17

I usually respond to Sadje’s question in her comments, but this one is a bit more in-depth for me, so I’m doing a full post instead.
I’m a people person and get on with almost everybody. I didn’t have a bunch of friends at school, just classmates and acquaintances, and in my working life, I knew a lot of people, were friendly with them all, but ‘friends?’ Not really, though I do have one friend I have known since 1980 when I was working for the building company. It was she who told me to ‘Keep this one, he’s useful’, the best advice I was ever given.

We learned a lot when we were in the cottage about fair weather friends and users. We began to doubt ourselves, and backed off from everyone, not encouraging friendships, though we would engage in conversation.

Life in the boating community changed that, everyone had one thing in common, a boat, and that was all that was need to feel a sense of belonging.
We made friends both on and off the water, and are still in touch with most of them.

Here it is pretty similar, the common denominator to open conversation was having a dog. There are a lot around here, and I get trashed by most of them. Maggie was used to that, but we always reassured her that we loved her best. We still go for our walks and our friends have commented it’s strange to see us without her.

We have made friends, but it’s been a gradual process and the Covid pandemic has brought our little community closer together.  Gone are the days of knocking on someone’s back door in the ’60s and ’70s,  shouting ‘Coo-ee!’ and knowing a cup of tea would always be in the offing. We pride ourselves on offering tea or coffee before anyone takes their coat off, but the casual chat over tea and digestives I remember my mother having are a distant memory.

Before Covid, it was easy to chat with everyone. Now we are more guarded, and keep our distance from people we don’t recognise as locals. Thus we continue to know a lot of people by sight, but to make a new friend takes time.


About pensitivity101

I am a retired number cruncher with a vivid imagination and wacky sense of humour which extends to short stories and poetry. I love to cook and am a bit of a dog whisperer as I get on better with them than people sometimes! We have recently lost our beloved dog Maggie who adopted us as a 7 week old pup in March 2005. We decided to have a photo put on canvas as we had for her predecessor Barney, and now have three pictures of our fur babies on the wall as we found a snapshot of my GSD so had hers done too. From 2014 to 2017 'Home' was a 41 foot narrow boat where we made strong friendships both on and off the water. We were close to nature enjoying swan and duck families for neighbours, and it was a fascinating chapter in our lives. We now reside in a small bungalow on the Lincolnshire coast where we have forged new friendships and interests.
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14 Responses to Sunday Poser # 17

  1. Sadje says:

    Thanks Di for this response. Covid has erected a barrier between people and making friends is even more difficult. I think we all know about fair weather friends and are wary of them. A place where there is a sense of community and belonging is the best kind. 👍👍👍

  2. What a lovely meme! That’s true too! ❤

  3. willowdot21 says:

    I really like your honesty 💜

  4. murisopsis says:

    I think it is the same the world over. Most people have plenty of acquaintances but the circle of true friends is small. COVID has made that circle even more exclusive. I think there are only 3 people I’ve seen during the pandemic – that has narrowed our social horizons to nearly a dot!!

    • At least we can wave at our dog walking friends when we go out. Dogs don’t go for social distancing of course, and I so love getting trashed, but as safely as possible.

  5. Pingback: Is it easy for you to make new friends – Art Mater – Dreams of Dreamers & etc

  6. Carol anne says:

    the pandemic has made everything so much harder, I remember back in the 80’s how easy it was to make friends with neighbours, not now, though. Xxx

    • Everyone is wary of everyone else. We acknowledge our friends, but apart from our neighbour who is part of our bubble as she’s on her own, we don’t socialise as much as we used to.

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