Sometimes

Sometimes the world seems to be turning without you.
It’s a weird feeling, as you’re awake but walking in a haze, putting one foot in front of the other as a matter of course, but totally unaware of which direction you’re taking.
You reach your destination and have no clear recollection of how you got there, just that you arrived and were glad of it.
Hours stretch to days, then weeks, sometimes months and there is no conscious difference between each twenty four hours as everything has a sameness and we lose track of time.
Conversations babble around you, the occasional word filters through your mental fog, and you realise someone is actually talking to you, but you have no idea what about.
You stare at them blankly, they repeat whatever it was, but your mind has already flittered elsewhere and their words are lost again in the cocoon of your silence.
It’s not that you mean to be rude, are ignoring them, or unaware of their presence, it’s just that they are there, and you are………. well, not. At least not in the same place, time frame or mindset as they are.
Some people describe it as being ‘away with the fairies’ or ‘lost in a world of their own’.
Wherever we are in that stasis, we are indeed alone and no-one is privy to our thoughts or surroundings. It is as if we have shut ourselves off from everything and everyone, be it for our own protection in the case of trauma or just wishing to retract from the current status quo to self analyse or regroup.
We eventually catch up and begin to feel part of the revolving world again, but that ‘sometimes’ space is so vitally needed when we feel things spiralling out of control and we need to take stock to regain our equilibrium.

About pensitivity101

I am a retired number cruncher with a vivid imagination and wacky sense of humour which extends to short stories and poetry. I love to cook and am a bit of a dog whisperer as I get on better with them than people sometimes! In November 2020, we lost our beloved Maggie who adopted us as a 7 week old pup in March 2005. We decided to have a photo put on canvas as we had for her predecessor Barney. We now have three pictures of our fur babies on the wall as we found a snapshot of Kizzy, my GSD when Hubby and I first met so had hers done too. On February 24th 2022 we were blessed to find Maya, a 13 week old GSD pup who has made her own place in our hearts. You can follow our training methods, photos and her growth in my blog posts. From 2014 to 2017 'Home' was a 41 foot narrow boat where we made strong friendships both on and off the water. We were close to nature enjoying swan and duck families for neighbours, and it was a fascinating chapter in our lives. We now reside in a small bungalow on the Lincolnshire coast where we have forged new friendships and interests.
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11 Responses to Sometimes

  1. Wow, I don’t think I’ve ever heard this more aptly described before.

  2. blindzanygirl says:

    I relate

  3. jenanita01 says:

    This must be a kind of fail safe, an island of safety when we don’t realise we need one…

  4. Carol anne says:

    that thing where you are going somewhere, and you end up there with no recollection of how you got there? That is dissociation, I go through that on a daily basis, dissociative episodes are a part of life for me. xoxo

  5. murisopsis says:

    Seems a default safety measure when we get too overwhelmed. I’ve done that before and wondered how I got from point A to point B. I always wished it was because I developed the super power of teleportation… Hope your stress levels go down a notch!

  6. willowdot21 says:

    Life is being very cruel to s lot of people right now. Thank goodness for safe places πŸ’œ

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