FPQ #82

The question:

Do you judge yourself by the same standards that you judge others? If not, are you harsher or more lenient on yourself?

I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt (present tourist issues aside), and not to judge a book by its cover as there could be underlying reasons why people are the way they are.
I concede there are things other people do that I could or would not, but again circumstances come to the fore.
If anything, I think I am harder on myself as I don’t do as well as I think I should, or in the case of technology, can’t get my head round it, get frustrated and this leads to anger…………. with myself.
In my working life, I had a routine as to how things were or should be done, and when training other people, would encourage them to learn the basics, whys and wherefores before looking for shortcuts or omissions. I did not expect more of them than I did of myself, and also would not give them a job I was not prepared to do myself either.
I believe in being fair above all else, what’s good for one is good for everyone else, and abhor those who practice the “Do as I say, not as I do” approach.

About pensitivity101

I am a retired number cruncher with a vivid imagination and wacky sense of humour which extends to short stories and poetry. I love to cook and am a bit of a dog whisperer as I get on better with them than people sometimes! We have recently lost our beloved dog Maggie who adopted us as a 7 week old pup in March 2005. We decided to have a photo put on canvas as we had for her predecessor Barney, and now have three pictures of our fur babies on the wall as we found a snapshot of my GSD so had hers done too. From 2014 to 2017 'Home' was a 41 foot narrow boat where we made strong friendships both on and off the water. We were close to nature enjoying swan and duck families for neighbours, and it was a fascinating chapter in our lives. We now reside in a small bungalow on the Lincolnshire coast where we have forged new friendships and interests.
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11 Responses to FPQ #82

  1. colinandray says:

    Perhaps the FPQ is totally immaterial and blatantly thoughtless. Judging, by definition, must include a comparative reference point or scale, Judging others is totally wrong at any level simply because we have not lived their lives and cannot therefore make any comparison. Judging ourselves serves nothing positive, because we are setting ourselves up against another’s perceived standard. The conclusion would either be false self praise (I am better than them), or negative impact on self-esteem (I wish I could be like them). Neither would be considered as serving any productive purpose.

    • Interesting line of thought Colin. We are all different. I don’t see anyone as actually better than anyone else, just circumstances more fortuitous for some and some people can do some things better than others. Who gives me the right to ‘judge’ anyone anyway?

  2. Sadje says:

    I think one should not be too hard on oneself either.

  3. Carol anne says:

    I tend to judge myself harshly and not judge others in the same way, probably because of my abuse history, I was told over and over that everything was my fault growing up. xoxo

  4. murisopsis says:

    I’ve always been my own worst critic when it comes to my writing and poetry. I tend to trust everyone until proven wrong. And I have been proven wrong but more often I’m right and those are the folks that are real friends.

  5. You know, you touched on something that I totally overlooked when I wrote my response. The TRAINING of other folks at the workplace bit. I was asked to that at all the jobs I had, and often it was to train my own replacement. Everyone I trained always told me I was so patient and I explained the procedures or rules so well that it was fairly easy for them to step right up. Hmmm. Maybe that is an area where I could have been proud of myself without being haughty about it. Good thought! Thanks for reminding me!

    • I took a pride in the way I trained staff. It would be on a One-on-One and I remember training one young girl who was good at her job but lacked confidence. I told her one morning she was going to do the month end reports on her own and she went white. I told her not to worry, she had done it with me several times before and now she would do it with me there for back up just in case. She did it perfectly! When I handed in my notice, she was perfectly capable of being my successor, but they brought in someone else (a friend of the accounts manager) who cocked everything up in three days and didn’t last a week. My trainee looked for another supervisory job and got it, so she walked too!

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