Although I’d write to Mum once or twice a week, towards the end of her life I knew I wouldn’t get a reply. Several times when we visited she would be reading one of my letters, and regardless of the date, it was as if it had just been received. It was important to know that the last letter I wrote to her had been received and read to her by one of the nurses in the hospital.

I had hoped maybe to find a single letter tucked away somewhere, but if there is one, I haven’t found it yet. There is a footnote in Mum’s hand on the bottom of her Will which made me cry because it was so ‘her’ and it pulled at my heart.
I miss her,Β  but she is with me every day looking back at me from the mirror.
I love this picture of the two of us taken in October 2016 which was before my first surgery to dispose of Humphrey. I’d lost almost three stone in weight here
and it shows from the above picture taken in May 2015.

These were taken in February 2017

I was given a shoe box at Mum’s funeral containing some things she had put aside for me. Many are in little boxes, each labelled in her own hand which makes them doubly precious. I keep this in my underwear drawer just as it had been on the boat and remember her giving it to me when we were in the cottage.
The fragrance has long since gone, but I will never part with it.

It reads:

Special Daughter

A daughter is a blessing
A treasure for all time
Your laughter, warmth and loving
Make me proud that you are mine.
With every year that passes
You’re more special than before
Through every stage and every age
I love you even more.

I love you too Mum.


About pensitivity101

I am a retired number cruncher with a vivid imagination and wacky sense of humour which extends to short stories and poetry. I love to cook and am a bit of a dog whisperer as I get on better with them than people sometimes! In November 2020, we lost our beloved Maggie who adopted us as a 7 week old pup in March 2005. We decided to have a photo put on canvas as we had for her predecessor Barney. We now have three pictures of our fur babies on the wall as we found a snapshot of Kizzy, my GSD when Hubby and I first met so had hers done too. On February 24th 2022 we were blessed to find Maya, a 13 week old GSD pup who has made her own place in our hearts. You can follow our training methods, photos and her growth in my blog posts. From 2014 to 2017 'Home' was a 41 foot narrow boat where we made strong friendships both on and off the water. We were close to nature enjoying swan and duck families for neighbours, and it was a fascinating chapter in our lives. We now reside in a small bungalow on the Lincolnshire coast where we have forged new friendships and interests.
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34 Responses to Precious

  1. Sadje says:

    A precious post !

  2. TheHiddenEdge says:

    Your post has made me cry. My Dad couldn’t hear us on the phone and because we couldn’t visit, I wrote, sending copies of some of my blog posts, as life isn’t that interesting in lockdown. I don’t know whether he got the last one and his belongings have ‘gone missing” but I do know that he got the others and those of my cousins’ emails that I printed off and forwarded. I like to think he knew we were all thinking about him stuck in the hospital. I guess I too will never know …

    • I am truly sorry for your loss. I lost my Dad the day after my 40th birthday in 1996. I was with him when he died, as was my Mum and Bro. I hope my sister was with Mum when she passed away in 2018 but I will never know as she’s never mentioned it and we have little contact now. I was able to speak to her a couple of days before and she knew who I was. We were 250 miles away so visited when we could and we did see her before Christmas in 2017 in the home, and I saw a spark of recognition when she opened her eyes for a few minutes and knew I was there. I will never forget that.

  3. fransiweinstein says:

    Beautiful tribute Di, and those are wonderful photos of you and your mom. You can see the deep love you had for each other.

  4. Oh my!! ❀ How beautiful and how special your mum was. Even though I didn't get along with mine as well as you did with yours, I still miss my "Ma". I also see her peeking at me from the looking glass and am startled once again that I look that 'old' and that much like her. I have a small box of things she left behind that, although not labeled for me especially, were definitely not things one would give a man, so I got them. I have some of the things she shared with her crazy sister too..a plaque about sisters (I have no sisters), and a china figurine of two little girls playing with a dog. Those things wouldn't fetch two dollars on the market place, but they have no price tag and are priceless to me. I suspect it's the same for you and your treasures. Was today an anniversary of importance for your mother and you? Or were you just thinking of her and remembering when? Thank YOU for sharing your precious memories with the rest of us.

    • No special anniversary Melanie, just moving things aside in the drawer and there it was.
      Mum and Dad would have celebrated their 70th anniversary in August and I’m sure wherever they are they will have a kneesup! I may not have been able to visit Mum as often as we’d like, but when we did, we made the most of it and made some good memories.

  5. colinandray says:

    Such a precious souvenir, and memory, of the past … and it cost little more than a few minutes to write. Such is the value of time. I have letters from my Mum and Dad, and elder sister, and they’re each worth far more than many people can imagine. Enjoy your memories Di, because it is surely what they would have wanted. πŸ™‚

  6. willowdot21 says:

    Such a beautiful and heartfelt post thank you for sharing πŸ’œβ€οΈπŸ’•πŸ’•

  7. joyroses13 says:

    So sweet and tender Di! Thanks for sharing! Love the pics!

  8. That is so sweet. After losing my husband and son, I found a new therapist to help me with the grieving process. One of the things that came up was that when I was 23 my mom died and I always remember just wishing she had left me a note or something, just for me. It probably explains why when my kids were babies and I had to have surgery I wrote them both letters telling them how much they were loved, just in case.

  9. murisopsis says:

    I hope you suddenly find one of the letters! It would be a treasure. I love the series of photos of the two of you laughing – made me smile…

  10. Such beautiful memories. Even though they may be gone, they will continue to live in our hearts. Gone but never forgotten

  11. Carol anne says:

    Awww! How lovely! You had a great relationship with your mum. I am so glad for you that you have many happy memories and personal items of hers. πŸ’–πŸ˜˜

    • I had a special relationship and wished we lived closer, or that she had decided to come and live with us, but she was happy where she was and felt needed, plus the family were all there and it would have been cruel to uproot her to 250 miles away when no-one would be likely to visit her.

  12. Janis says:

    This is so touching!!!

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