1. Where will you find a windlass?
On a windmill. It’s the poor girl who got her skirts caught in the sails.
2. What’s the difference between a paddle and an oar?
You don’t need an oar to paddle your feet in the sea.
3. How do you bore water?
Fill a glass and talk to it about the weather.
4. If 007 has a licence to kill, what do the previous 6 have licences for?
001: how to make tea
002: how to bake cookies
003: how to snare a millionaire
004: how to imitate affection
005: how to forge signatures on insurance documents
006: how to use poisons
5. Why do we have pancakes on Shrove Tuesday?
To use up all the old ingredients in the cupboard for a food binge before the Big Diet.
6. Why do we say something is ‘dog-eared’ if it’s shabby or tatty?
Cats tend to be too proud to look bedraggled.
7. What colour are peacock eggs?
Any colour you like if you can find one!
8. What is the difference between the Big Dipper and The Plough?
You can have a big dipper for your sherbet fountain, but a plough wouldn’t fit in the tube.
9. How do you make Sloe Gin?
Slowly of course!
10. Who were The Goons?
The next door neighbours of The Addams Family.
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