Banks, Budgets and Bullshit

Most of us take it for granted that we can have a bank account.
The choice of course is ours, savings, ISAs, cheque account, one that pays interest monthly, one that has a monthly admin charge but there are other perks such as cheaper travel insurance or a premium rate on your savings, loans, credit cards etc etc.
It seems I may be no longer entitled to hold one.
I have been a customer of my bank for almost 25 years, and received a standard letter of notification that the terms and conditions are changing from October 31st.
Not a problem you might think, until you hit the paragraph that lists the criteria required to hold a simple bank account, you know one with no frills, money goes in and you take it out until there are only a few pennies left.

In order to have a ‘basic bank account’, I need to pay in £500 a month or £3000 in a six month period. That is a hysterical joke as my pension is over two hundred notes short of that, and I have no other income apart from two little annuities that total £150 A YEAR.
A ‘basic bank account’ gives you a bank card, but no cheque book or overdraft facility. OK, I can do without the latter, so it may not be a problem, IF there is no minimum monthly deposit.
Talking to someone in a call centre is usually on the other side of the world, and the last time I had need to speak to one, they actually cancelled my bank statements when it was nothing to do with my enquiry. Since then, I have preferred to go into a branch to do any non-over-the-phone business and to talk to a cashier if need be. I would not touch Internet Banking or Apps with someone else’s barge pole.
Hm, seems I needed to make an appointment, so a call centre job it was…………. eventually, after going through 15 options before a little voice of an individual answered.
I had to spell the branch I wanted to go to as they had never heard of it. The earliest appointment there was Friday. No good, so luckily there is an alternative branch in the opposite direction.
Again, I had to spell it, but there was a slot available for today, so I booked in.
‘How many seats?’
What???? I’m not going to dinner or the theatre for chrissakes.
Seems they have to book in the number of people, so I have booked two in case Hubby comes in. The dog will have to come as well unless we can park really close and leave her in the car, weather permitting. It may be too hot later anyway.

I am going armed with my letter, cheque book and a list of questions. If I cannot continue with my present bank account, I can get round it by having my pension paid into our joint account and close my private one.
What a farce. Yet another way for TPTB to keep a track of income in case of tax avoidance.  It amazes me how we manage!

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