Birthday’s Past

I found myself thinking about a relative whose birthday it was today.
She was related by marriage, being the fourth wife and widow of my paternal grandfather.
Mum, Dad and I lived with them for almost a year in 1972-73.

She was a teapot of a woman, round with short legs, but her heart was in the right place, and I know I was a difficult teenager to be around at that time.
She loved her bingo and wrestling on the TV, and every year would have a Butlins holiday on her own.
She was a tasty cook, making the most fabulous pastry, but if you ever saw her prepare a meal, chances are you wouldn’t enjoy it as she was what one would deem a ‘messy cook’.
She couldn’t cook a chicken to save her life though. It was either still running with blood or tough as old boots.
She had a fat dachshund that had to be carried up the stairs to bed at night, and in the morning he would rock his front legs over the top step and slide down on his belly to the bottom. He had a bald tummy because of it. She had a jack russell after that, a dog that was forever raiding the cupboard under the sink and seemed to like the taste of soap!

After Gramps died in 1974, she moved away, whether it was to be nearer her son I don’t know, though certainly not to live with him. I didn’t like him much or his stuck up wife, and never forgave him for digging out the rose bushes that were my granddad’s pride and joy.
She ended up in a nursing home on the outskirts of Bath, and as I was living there at the time, it’s possible that I visited her once. To be honest, I can’t remember, and I feel bad about that as she had no other family.
When she died, Mum and Dad came up for the funeral and the three of us attended together. It was 1985 I believe, but again I’m not sure, as I’m tying it in with fostering and who was staying with me at the time. We were kindred spirits in that respect because she’d fostered kids too.

Her funeral was one of the saddest affairs I’ve ever attended.
I’d arranged for a floral tribute from us, and that was the only flowers I can remember.
There were five of us: Mum, Dad, me, her son and his wife.
She was wheeled in on a trolley, words said, and wheeled out again.
No music, no singing, no eulogy, nothing personal.
I don’t even think her son acknowledged any of us.

I couldn’t tell you how old she was. I do remember some of the stories she told me years ago when she was in service, and she was quite a character. She was a qualified Silver Service waitress, and a housekeeper as well as cook. She didn’t have a happy life in her younger days and brought her son up on her own. As far as I knew though she and Gramps were a good match for companionship and she was always smiling whenever we visited.

Happy birthday Yvonne, wherever you are.


About pensitivity101

I am a retired number cruncher with a vivid imagination and wacky sense of humour which extends to short stories and poetry. I love to cook and am a bit of a dog whisperer as I get on better with them than people sometimes! In November 2020, we lost our beloved Maggie who adopted us as a 7 week old pup in March 2005. We decided to have a photo put on canvas as we had for her predecessor Barney. We now have three pictures of our fur babies on the wall as we found a snapshot of Kizzy, my GSD when Hubby and I first met so had hers done too. On February 24th 2022 we were blessed to find Maya, a 13 week old GSD pup who has made her own place in our hearts. You can follow our training methods, photos and her growth in my blog posts. From 2014 to 2017 'Home' was a 41 foot narrow boat where we made strong friendships both on and off the water. We were close to nature enjoying swan and duck families for neighbours, and it was a fascinating chapter in our lives. We now reside in a small bungalow on the Lincolnshire coast where we have forged new friendships and interests.
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4 Responses to Birthday’s Past

  1. colinandray says:

    It’s nice that you still remember her. No doubt she did the best she could (in her life) with what she knew, and it is sad that nobody (namely her son) could not offer a personal tribute to that at her funeral. Considering that we think of ourselves as the most advanced species on this planet, we do seem to leave a lot to be desired.

    • I had no time for her son at all, and he didn’t visit his mother very often.
      They offered us a place to stay when we had nowhere else to go until things could get sorted out. It was not an easy time for any of us.

  2. lbeth1950 says:

    You have painted a fascinating picture. I have a million questions.

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