My sister has sent me a text to say she is scattering Mum’s ashes tomorrow.
There is no way we can attend, but at least we can light a candle for her at the due time.
The entry in the Book of Remembrance will be for both of them on their wedding anniversary in August. Sis thought the weather would be better should we wish to travel down to see it.
There is no need for us to visit Down South now. We only went to see Mum after all.
Family there have their own lives of which we have no part and Mum is forever with me.
I loved my Mum and Dad very much, but in the circumstances, a seven and a half hour journey to read three lines is impractical, and my parents would appreciate that.
Photo: extract from Mum’s collage Feb 2018. I think the photo of Mum and Dad was taken at a wedding.
I understand that provided you give the crematorium staff notice, you can arrange to view a particular day at any time, and also believe we will be able to view the relevant page on-line in due course.
I’m glad Sis has finally got her act together though, whatever the reasons are for her delay.
pensitivity101 
I’m glad that your sister told you in advance when your Mum’s ashes will be scattered so you can be thinking of your Mum at the time and say another good bye.
I was so afraid that she would go ahead and tell me after the event. But now I know the day and time, I can plan ahead.
This is what I was worried about as well.
Saying goodbye properly is an important part of the process.
It is important to me, even though we can’t get there.
I’m glad you have this closure and the peace that comes with it.
Hopefully yes for everyone. I was speaking with Bro in NZ earlier, and it’s even harder for him being so far away. Apparently both he and my Uncle have spoken to my sister recently.
Seems like your sister is at least trying to do a bit better.
Love the collage.
I’m glad she told me, I was so afraid she wouldn’t. I was going through my camera chip and found several I hadn’t used before. I was cropping them for future use, so was thinking about Mum when the text came through.
One would think that such information would have merited a phone call, but I understand that your sister is as difficult to deal with as mine is. Hope you have a great weekend.
Sis sent me a text when Mum died (I rang her straight back) as she did with the funeral details (which I never got). In a way I’m glad she doesn’t ring, and I won’t ring her, as I’m afraid of what I might say.
In that case, you understand why my sister and I haven’t spoken in over a year.
Yep. I can understand perfectly.
This may have been hard for your sister too. As the full time caretaker she must have experiences both relief and sadness at your mother’s death. Unfortunately you aren’t high on her list of concerns but it seems like she tried this time. You said it all when you said the you Mum is with you forever. Traveling doesn’t make you closer.
I’ve been thinking that too Kate. We all grieve differently and to a different time scale. Mum would not have wanted any ill feeling or to have been an inconvenience. My emotions are all over the place obviously, but I am hoping they will now begin to settle down as will everyone elses.
I’ll echo Scifi – so happy your sister told you about this.
Me too. We would love to be able to go down, but it just isn’t possible.