All catching up with me………….

I have been surprised how well I’ve felt following Humphrey’s removal and wondering when it would all begin to catch up with me.
pink-ribbonSince diagnosis, I have been given a folder with leaflets and literature about different types of breast cancers, treatments, including chemo and radiotherapy, exercises, helplines and support, all of which have been useful, reassuring, and simple to understand.
I’ve gone into it all with an open mind, as I am convinced that because I have never been really ill, never had surgery and thus no after treatment before all this started, my body hasn’t a floor plan to fall back on or compare notes to as to how it should react.

I have completed 11 of my 20 treatments, which equates to 55%, and anticipated that I would start to feel the expected tiredness this week.
Hubby worked out the radiation levels and came up with these figures:
45 to 60 Gy, 1.8-2 Gy over 20 sessions, or fractions as they call them.
I’m afraid it means nothing to me, all I know is each treatment takes about 2 minutes and sometimes five times that long to line me up for it.

Hubby’s been a brick and let me sleep on in the mornings, so the tiredness has been kept at bay to a certain degree. But there is feeling tired, being knackered,Β  or just plain exhausted, and I’m trying to work out which best describes me just now.
Many years ago I slept away almost an entire weekend, but then I was in my teens and had been burning the candle at both ends.
This is different and this tiredness is referred to as fatigue in my paperwork.
I feel heavy in my movements, can’t put my mind to anything and frustrated as hell because I don’t have the energy to do very much even if I could put my mind to anything! This in turn is giving me gigantic mood swings with Hubby in easy range of the firing line (bless him, he puts up with so much crap from me these days), and when I do finally get my act together, I get all hot and bothered because everything is such a damn effort!
It doesn’t help that either the radiation or my meds is interfering with my appetite (even if SW is on hold for a bit) and I’m bloody hungry all the time! Grrrrrrr!
diet smileyToday I set myself a challenge as I wanted to find a home for one of the ten pound dash gifts I bought for Hubby which meant a little reorganisation of our shelving unit. I’ve already done posts on our little knick knacks, but can you see the latest addition?
shelf-jan-2017Believe it or not, it took me over an hour to dust here today, but I managed to get everything back in eventually, including his gift:
additionb shelf-addition

Last night we played scrabble, and had two really good games, one bettering our best score to date. By 8pm I was shattered.
All I did was walk Maggie back from MSM’s house to the boat, and I was totally wasted.
Take pill, clean teeth, in bed by 8.35 and asleep by 8.45.
I slept off and on due to hot flushes, but when I woke up fully at 8.10, I felt rested.
Time to start the day as normal by walking Maggie.

Actually, she has had three Avenue walks today, so I am on course for my daily exercise.
I’m tired, but not to the extent where I need to go to bed for a power nap for an hour. I’m sure that will come later.
The lubed boob is still tinged blue, but developing a noticeable blotch of a tan. Every so often I get a needle-type twinge which is uncomfortable but doesn’t last or sufficient enough for me to reach for painkillers.
I’ve invested in an extension for the sports bras to give me just that little bit of extra room, especially at night when I’m restless due to my lousy body temperature control.

Five normal treatments next week. My final four the following week are boost treatments, concentrating on the area Humphrey made himself a temporary home.
Of all of them, those are probably the ones that are going to affect me the most and knock me for six.
But first I have two days off.

I’ve cleaned through the boat and we’ve done the week’s laundry (I even got the iron out of the boot because our tee-shirts were just a tad too wrinkly to get away without).
I’ve cooked one of the best sweet and sour’s for a while, and now we are sitting with our feet up to relax for the evening.

maggie-jan-2017I took this an hour ago. Hard to believe Our Baby will be 12 on Tuesday.


About pensitivity101

I am a retired number cruncher with a vivid imagination which extends to short stories and poetry. I love to cook and have a terrible sweet tooth. Best friends are Hubby, our dog Maggie, Bro in NZ, MSM and MOH (and his dog). I am also a bit of a dog whisperer as I get on better with them than people sometimes! Due to a nightmare of a house sale in 2014, 'Home' was a 41 foot narrow boat until April 2017. We made strong friendships both on and off the water, and enjoyed swan and duck families for neighbours. Sadly times change and we were once again house hunting until September. We now reside in a small bungalow a short distance from the beach on the Lincolnshire coast.
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24 Responses to All catching up with me………….

  1. colinandray says:

    How time flies when you’re having fun! πŸ™‚

  2. I’ve never had cancer nor been on chemo, but when I was very sick with my ulcerative colitis, I went through a period of extreme fatigue and moodiness. Even now, when I have a bad flare-up, I find myself unable to do anything much except sleep – which leads to frustration and anger at my body and myself and which sometimes gets taken out on those around me. It sounds like you have a very understanding and patient husband. You’ll get through this and eventually get back to a more normal life. Hugs.

    • Thanks so much for your comment of support. Hubby is brilliant, and we were both so relieved when I was told I didn’t need to have chemo. We’ll be glad when the radiotherapy is finished so that we can get back to normal. Only nine more to go!

  3. foguth says:

    I’m trying to get a couple loads of laundry done today …. you’re shaming me with everything you accomplished.

  4. It all sounds normal. I remember being told when I had the radiation (twice a day for 5 days) that I could work through it. Not! Part was the radiation and part was the anxiety that goes along with it. It was very tiring. I think you are doing great.

  5. kiwinana says:

    All the best for the rest of your treatment, you have a wonderful husband being there and helping you through your bad days, sounds like hot flushes swings. Look after yourself that’s the main thing.
    One day you will look back and smile about all this. Keep laughing if you can. Cheer!

    • Thank you so much for your positive comment. I am indeed lucky to have Hubby and the support of friends both here in WP and around me has been amazing. Life is good and I am getting better, so I certainly have a lot to smile about. πŸ™‚

  6. Barb Knowles says:

    I agree with Kate Crimmins above that anxiety could be taking its toll, even if you don’t realize it. I’ve never had cancer, although I had quite a scare a little less than a year ago. But I have had a number of small strokes and the doctors all said that stress and anxiety played a part. Who isn’t stressed out? Perhaps meditating monks? Your attitude is definitely better than mine….I’m going to try to take a page from your book. And I envy you the progress you’ve made on your diet. I’m not doing well on that front. I abhor exercise, but can tolerate walking. I just have to force myself. I admire your strength!

    • Oh Barb, I hate exercise, but enjoy walking so having Maggie helps. I used to get panic attacks, and have suffered from depression, but I cannot fault the treatment I’ve had for this and feel quite confident with the staff I come in contact with. Of course the hanging around for two weeks at a time whilst they were doing their tests etc was a stressful time for both of us, so that indeed could be a part of it.
      As for the diet, SW works for me (well, it was up to now), the key being that a third of your plate is made up of ‘speed food’ (fruit or veg). It also helps that I no longer buy butter/margarine/spread or jams, and recently have kicked yoghurts into touch as we discovered they were bad for Hubby! Swings and roundabouts. What works for one doesn’t necessarily work for someone else, and also what worked one week may not work the next! Hope some of my recipes help as they are low fat/fatless as I don’t use oils to cook and don’t fry anything at all now.

      • Barb Knowles says:

        Yes the recipes do help. I don’t fry either. I got a new big crockpot (slow cooker) for Christmas; my old one is small and from 1975 although it still works, so have been using that with some American Heart Association recipes. I’ve found different Canadian resources, such as recipes from the Canadian Diabetes Association to be better than the American ones. I don’t have diabetes, although had gestational diabetes with my last pregnancy. But the recipes are very healthy and are pleasing to the eye and stomach.

      • We don’t have a slow cooker, though there are a lot of SW recipes that call for one. We use our pressure cooker for stews these days, though used it for rabbits and gammon joints too. I have type 2 diabetes which is controlled by diet, not meds, so have to watch my sugars, even if they are natural. It’s all a balancing act, but we eat well, and try to keep the ‘bad’ goodies in line!

      • Barb Knowles says:

        Moderation is a completely foreign concept for me.

      • me too actually, but I try!

  7. Barb Knowles says:

    Oh and your dog looks much younger than 12!

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