The theory behind this post is (hopefully) a piece of fiction, though fans of Roald Dahl may be familiar with a similar Tale of the Unexpected.
I attended a poetry course in 1974 having been put forward by a particular gentleman in the circle of friends of my first fiance’s parents. This gentleman had an eleven year old son who had quite a vivid imagination and had great pleasure in telling us his idea of the perfect murder as we were all enjoying an evening drink over his orange squash.
It all revolved around using a large frozen leg of meat as a club to beat the victim senseless and to death. The body would be dismembered using one of the latest kitchen gadgetry electric carving knives, and the pieces frozen.
These would later be put into a grinder and ground to a fine powder which in turn would be flushed down the loo or spread on the garden as fertiliser to disperse in the wind.
The joint would be defrosted and eaten with the Sunday roast, thus destroying the evidence of a weapon.
Makes you wonder doesn’t it.
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