Putting the DI in DIY

Hubby and I aren’t exactly brilliant at the do-it-yourself game, but whatever job we have done has been pretty good, lasts, and is most importantly safe.
Over the years, we’ve tackled replacement doors, kitchens and bathrooms, the usual decorating and of course our now-absent-but-soon-to-be-reinstated-on-the-roof veg patch.
We are champions at I A O , even if our methods are perhaps a little unorthodox or unusual.

Hubby is the King of Kitchenituspilferous, and I have lost countless knives, even a couple of spoons, to his toolbox. Unfortunately my best pair of tweezers are now under training as pliers and doubling up as a scraper.
The best improvisation I did personally though had to be the inspired use of chopsticks on mortar on an outside wall when plumbing in a tumble drier ventilation hose.
The trowel was too big and nothing else would fit to ‘level it off’ nicely, so we slapped a healthy ball of mortar mix in the relevant place and I smoothed over the edges and surface with a plastic chopstick from the local takeaway.
It worked, it stayed put, and was still there two years later without so much as a single crack.

I’m pleased to say that the boat does not require any mortar repairs!
However, it does require maintaining and keeping on top of those little jobs that could well become major issues if not addressed.

I’m not much good with a hammer (the nails always go in crooked and I’m afraid I’ll hit me rather than the nail) but I can change a plug and I’m not too bad with a screwdriver.
However, I cannot ice a cake to save my life, unless it’s the ready-to-roll icing on top of which I stick a little plastic Santa, Merry Christmas, a tree and a reindeer.
As for writing or piping those pretty little patterns, ribbons and roses, forget it.
Today, I had a crash course in ‘icing’ due to an over zealous scrub of the back of the bathroom basin with a toothbrush which sadly resulted in the sealant coming away.

Purchasing the right colour of bathroom sealant was a joke, and as for the cost!!!!!!
Bloody hell, nearly eight quid for a tube (310ml) and all we wanted was about an inch!
We already had the syringe thing (cost a pound from a discount store rather than £4.99 from a DIY outlet), and by looking around different shops managed to get a tube for just over two pounds.

Not being an exact match meant that we (Hubby) had to remove the existing sealant (goodbye tweezers), and then it was my turn. He had already cut the end off the nozzle in readiness as sharp knives and I don’t mix, and I once cut my finger on THE BOX getting a new knife out!

Slowly and carefully I squeezed the trigger on the syringe and the sealant came out like a long skinny piece of soft spaghetti. I don’t have a steady hand at the best of times, so I had a few humps and bumps in my line.  It didn’t help that we have a centre tap which is fixed in position, so I had to go round/over/behind it.
As it turned out, I’d used too much gunge, and on wiping away the excess left air pockets so had to have another go.

The end result isn’t bad, has dried nicely and I feel quite pleased with myself.
At least water can’t seep down behind the sink and next time we need to get rid of a bit of discolouration, I’ll use a cotton bud and a little bleach!

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