Subtle hint…..

I don’t know why I do it to myself but sometimes I just hope that Someone would consider us for a change.
I have never hidden the fact that my family (other than Bro in NZ) and I are not close.
It is just one of those things, and sadly as time progresses, the gap gets bigger, though I keep trying to plug it. Hubby wonders why I bother but I can’t seem to stop myself.

I suppose you have to understand that some siblings are totally different, have a different set of values and handle visitors differently. The linked posts herein give you an idea of where I’m coming from.
happy birthdayI am thankful that my mother is safe and cared for as she lives with my sister. She is happy there, and enjoy visits from family members of the other four generations. I appreciate it’s not easy for my sister and though I tried to do my bit in the past, these days I am seen as not sharing the responsibility.
I am now considered a distant relative in more ways than one, so perhaps I gave up the right of being in anyone’s mind or thoughts when I moved away, though I always kept in touch.
mail delivery email mail

Since becoming one of many couples now living afloat, we have been down to visit once a month, usually taking Mum out to lunch and then coming home. I don’t begrudge that.
I never have and enjoy treating Mum whenever possible and however our pocket allowed.
Although the mileage and journey time is considerably less so fuel costs are lower now, taking Mum out to lunch is not exactly a sandwich or McD job.  At the moment money is tight, and quite honestly, we do not have £35 spare to treat her as on previous visits.

My sister has NEVER offered us a meal whenever we’ve visited, regardless of how many miles we’ve travelled or how long the journey took to get there, let alone the journey back. We may be lucky and be offered a cup of tea/coffee with the possibility of a biscuit, but a meal? No chance.

I decided to send an email expressing a wish to visit one day next week, but apologising for not being able to afford to take Mum out for lunch. It was a subtle hint asking to be fed.
I got a reply back today.
‘Don’t worry about lunch, I can probably make you a sandwich. If you’re lucky, there may be some cake left.’

Whenever we have visitors (even here on the boat), first thing offered is tea or coffee, biscuits if I have them. Our friend turned up unexpectedly a couple of weeks ago, and I could have made our as yet unprepared meal stretch to three, but suggested instead we go out to the pub for dinner as with 2 dogs and three adults on board, there wasn’t a lot of space. We paid of course, otherwise I wouldn’t have mentioned it.
However, if we had been in the house, a hot meal would have been the norm and a bed for the night if they’d travelled any distance.
It’s called hospitality.
The nearest we get is the 2 ‘t’s
mug of teaWonder what’ll be in the sandwich?

About pensitivity101

I am a retired number cruncher with a vivid imagination and wacky sense of humour which extends to short stories and poetry. I love to cook and am a bit of a dog whisperer as I get on better with them than people sometimes! In November 2020, we lost our beloved Maggie who adopted us as a 7 week old pup in March 2005. We decided to have a photo put on canvas as we had for her predecessor Barney. We now have three pictures of our fur babies on the wall as we found a snapshot of Kizzy, my GSD when Hubby and I first met so had hers done too. On February 24th 2022 we were blessed to find Maya, a 13 week old GSD pup who has made her own place in our hearts. You can follow our training methods, photos and her growth in my blog posts. From 2014 to 2017 'Home' was a 41 foot narrow boat where we made strong friendships both on and off the water. We were close to nature enjoying swan and duck families for neighbours, and it was a fascinating chapter in our lives. We now reside in a small bungalow on the Lincolnshire coast where we have forged new friendships and interests.
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2 Responses to Subtle hint…..

  1. I can relate in so many ways to your family situation. I have not written about it on my blog because I have not been ready to talk about it, but since we moved I had to remove myself from the relationship with one of my relatives. I am down to my parents and my sister from my side of the family. My husband’s side we only talk to his mum and his half brother. I do feel free now that I don’t have to pander to the relatives that treated me like trash.

    • Families can be a pain with their blinkered view and selfishness. There are only two people other than my Mum that we see as family, my Bro and our friend who has been such a brick through all our problems.
      For the rest, I see it as their loss, not mine.

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